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Mar. 8th, 2009 06:22 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
crystal_sun396Meme from Sai and Dre and... I think Sophie? And.... I am not keeping track, hey? Some of these apply to more than one person. Hopefully I'm pretty predictable in regards to things I would want to inform others of, or I haven't been doing my duty.
... Also, I can't shut up.
Things I Wish I Could Say to Different People Right Now:
1. You're still the person I trust the most in the world, and our friendship is still something I consider ideal. Perfect acceptance. One day we'll be in the same fandoms again, and we'll pick everything right up again. In the meantime, our occasional random throwing of hearts at each other is all I need.
2. I want to know you better, but I know you enough now to make a judgment. I have a right to make that judgment and you have earned it, honest. You're sweet and interesting. I like you. You should just accept that I like you for now instead of worrying about our degree of association. I can just change my mind later, if you disappoint me, okay? But I don't think you will.
3. Please, I do mean what I say when I fangirl all over you. The cognitive dissonance when I lie about stuff like that is usually too much trouble to bother with. It probably all sounds ridiculous by now. I bet it's repetitive. But I want to say it every time I think it; I want to let you know while I can, because I can.
4. You give great advice and lots of insights to things I would otherwise miss. You put up with me so graciously, it's like you're made of patience except you have to also be made of crack. I'm always a little surprised to remember that there exist people as supportive as you. You inspire me to be better for other people.
5. I've owed you candy for nearly two years now. I haven't forgotten, even if we haven't spoken for a while. I remember you every time I see that kind, and feel a little guilty inside.
6. Our friendship ended with such dignity. Or maybe I mean "paused". One can just as easily be the other, and maybe that's what I'm talking about. I still read your entries sometimes, and it makes me happy to see you doing well.
7. You are off-limits for a lot of things. This is a shame, because you are one of maybe two people I could see myself able to stand living with for any significant length of time and vice versa. After all, we've done it before. (And yeah, tried to kill each other daily, but we could be so good now.) At least our love for each other has got to be something like compulsory, by now. .... Actually, that's probably not good either.
8. I'm so sorry. You deserve so much more of me than I've been able to give, or maybe you deserve someone else who can actually give you those things. I will try to make more of an effort. I don't know why it is such an effort, besides the overhanging guilt (which is majorly counterproductive), but I can find out and deal with it. You're such a good person. Too good a person.
9. Every time you reassure me, I feel that much more comfortable. Every time we just talk probably helps too. The intimidated feeling is almost unavoidable since I've got this particular breed of awe for you. Um, so just be patient with me. I'll get over it.
10. You're the most natural teacher I know. It is really impressive. I love hearing you explaining things, no matter what they are, because you can make them so interesting and easy to grasp. All subjects of all complexities. You've patience and thoughtfulness and insane amounts of clarity of thought and expression. I wish I had some of that understanding, so that maybe I could be of more use to you. I wish I could give you the contentment you deserve.
... Also, I can't shut up.
Things I Wish I Could Say to Different People Right Now:
1. You're still the person I trust the most in the world, and our friendship is still something I consider ideal. Perfect acceptance. One day we'll be in the same fandoms again, and we'll pick everything right up again. In the meantime, our occasional random throwing of hearts at each other is all I need.
2. I want to know you better, but I know you enough now to make a judgment. I have a right to make that judgment and you have earned it, honest. You're sweet and interesting. I like you. You should just accept that I like you for now instead of worrying about our degree of association. I can just change my mind later, if you disappoint me, okay? But I don't think you will.
3. Please, I do mean what I say when I fangirl all over you. The cognitive dissonance when I lie about stuff like that is usually too much trouble to bother with. It probably all sounds ridiculous by now. I bet it's repetitive. But I want to say it every time I think it; I want to let you know while I can, because I can.
4. You give great advice and lots of insights to things I would otherwise miss. You put up with me so graciously, it's like you're made of patience except you have to also be made of crack. I'm always a little surprised to remember that there exist people as supportive as you. You inspire me to be better for other people.
5. I've owed you candy for nearly two years now. I haven't forgotten, even if we haven't spoken for a while. I remember you every time I see that kind, and feel a little guilty inside.
6. Our friendship ended with such dignity. Or maybe I mean "paused". One can just as easily be the other, and maybe that's what I'm talking about. I still read your entries sometimes, and it makes me happy to see you doing well.
7. You are off-limits for a lot of things. This is a shame, because you are one of maybe two people I could see myself able to stand living with for any significant length of time and vice versa. After all, we've done it before. (And yeah, tried to kill each other daily, but we could be so good now.) At least our love for each other has got to be something like compulsory, by now. .... Actually, that's probably not good either.
8. I'm so sorry. You deserve so much more of me than I've been able to give, or maybe you deserve someone else who can actually give you those things. I will try to make more of an effort. I don't know why it is such an effort, besides the overhanging guilt (which is majorly counterproductive), but I can find out and deal with it. You're such a good person. Too good a person.
9. Every time you reassure me, I feel that much more comfortable. Every time we just talk probably helps too. The intimidated feeling is almost unavoidable since I've got this particular breed of awe for you. Um, so just be patient with me. I'll get over it.
10. You're the most natural teacher I know. It is really impressive. I love hearing you explaining things, no matter what they are, because you can make them so interesting and easy to grasp. All subjects of all complexities. You've patience and thoughtfulness and insane amounts of clarity of thought and expression. I wish I had some of that understanding, so that maybe I could be of more use to you. I wish I could give you the contentment you deserve.
